jump to navigation

Rumblings and Grumblings from the Closet July 18, 2007

Posted by Ms. Poophet in Lifestyle Features.
add a comment

I am horrible.

If you walk into my room now, you will see clothes strewn over an unmade bed, handbags and newspapers piled up on my other bed (please don’t make me explain why I have two beds), more clothes spilling out of the closet onto the floor, and shoeboxes scattered all over the place. Who would believe I got voted Most Organized back in high school?

*Sigh*

It was my equivalent to Spring Cleaning Day. Except it’s not spring. And I doubt it’ll all be done in a day.

If you’re a packrat like I am, let me give you some advice:

  • Throw out all those useless things you’ve collected over the years. You know you’ll never use them, even if you keep telling yourself there will be an occasion when it’ll come in handy. It won’t.

  • Take snapshots of your shoes and stick them on the side of the shoebox. This way, your precious heels can be housed neatly and you won’t have a hard time finding the right shoes when you need them.

  • If you have more clothes than you can handle, pick out the ones you know you’ll never wear again and give them away to charity. Or if you insist on keeping them all, find a plastic drawer to store your more “casual” clothes so they don’t pile up on the floor!

  • Stuff your handbags with crumpled balls of paper to retain its shape. Keep your handbags in a plastic bag or in a breathable bag to protect it from dust. Again, snapshots come in handy when trying to locate the right bag.

  • Put some silica gel (those little packets of transparent beads that comes with crunchy snacks with the words “DO NOT EAT” in bold) in your shoe closet and handbag storage area to dehumidify your closet and prevent fungus from thriving in there! Eek!

Try to maintain this system and keep your room from becoming more cluttered.

Now, I must excuse myself and go clean up the mess in my room!

Careless Chewers Shall Burn in Hell! July 17, 2007

Posted by Ms. Poophet in Lifestyle Features.
add a comment

Ms. Poophet sat on gum today. Curse the damn chewer who was careless enough to leave a piece of gum stuck somewhere. Ms. Poophet hopes the chewer will burn in hell. I’m sure this has happened to you before…or not. Either way, fret not, as Ms. Poophet is here to save the day!

Dab the gum-infested area with some baby oil (peanut butter and butter is also said to have worked, but which would you rather have your clothes smelling like, baby oil or peanut butter? Exactly.). Rub the area free of gum with an old toothbrush until all the gum comes off. If doing this on leather, the oil will take the sheen of the leather out with the gum, leaving a dull area, but Ms. Poophet thinks that’s better than a white sticky mess.

Leave History in the Past July 16, 2007

Posted by The Daily Poo-phet in Under The Blanket.
add a comment

It’s hard to be in a relationship. It’s even harder to get out of a relationship. It can be so tempting to fall back into the familiar comforts of an old relationship, especially during those lonely nights when you’re all alone at home with nothing to do, or when you go back to a place where you two once shared a special memory together. But you broke up for a reason, so however lonely or tempting it gets (or however drunk you are), DO NOT pick up the phone and beg your ex for a reconciliation (or one night of sex for “old time’s sake”). Exercise some self control — yeah, it’s not easy, but here are some things you can do:

  • Stop daydreaming about the past and go to bed. When you wake up the next morning, it’ll all be over.

  • Go out. Remember, there are other fish in the sea! And keep in mind you’ll be meeting lots of people so don’t throw yourself at the first guy/girl who shows interest in you!

  • Hang out with your friends. Your chums are most effective in helping you heal a broken heart.

  • Keep yourself busy. Find a hobby.

  • Take a vacation. There’s nothing like a fresh start.

  • Have a fling! Enjoy your freedom!

Or if you’ve tried everything listed above and it STILL doesn’t work, try the following. I doubt it will fulfill the ’self-control’ part of getting over a relationship, but it MIGHT work. Never know until you try:

  • Build a bridge (preferably with his/her body bury underneath the foundation), and get over it.

  • Go to his/her house with your friends and throw soaked toilet tissue at his/her window.

  • Stalk him/her on dates and make HIS/HER life miserable.

  • Flirt and seduce him/her and then leave him/her hanging.

  • Make out with a same sex friend in front of him/her at a party. This will incur at least 2 results:

    1. He/She might think he/she drove you over the edge (it will help if you casually mention it to him/her).

    2. He’ll/She’ll feel sorry for losing the chance of having you AND your friend.