The Daily Poo-phet: where you read about the latest ta-poos!

Do you find that lying adds color to your drab life? Do you consistently lie whenever the opportunity arises? Take this quiz to find out if you are a true and certified compulsive liar:

1. You’re quitting your current job for a better offer elsewhere. When your boss asks you why you’re resigning, you tell him:
(a) you got offered a better deal somewhere else.
(b) you’re not sure if this is the right industry for you and you’re off to “discover” yourself.
(c) you’re going abroad for further studies and you’re leaving in two months’ time so your boss can’t convince you to stay.

2. You’re in a happy relationship and you love your significant other very much. One day while you’re out partying with your friends, an attractive member of the opposite sex shows interest in you and asks if you’d like to “grab a drink” some time. You answer:
(a) “Sure, I’d love to!” Then proceed to tell your friends to shut it about your significant other.
(b) “I’d like that. I can always use another friend.”
(c) “I can’t. I’m already taken.”

3. A friend gives you a hideous shirt for your birthday. You say:
(a) “Thanks, pal! I love it!” Then, wear it once for him/her to see before burying it deep in the abyss of your closet.
(b) “This is fugly, man! Where did you pick it up, the Ugly Apparels Store?!”
(c) “Cool! I ♥ it!” and give it away to charity ASAP. When your friend asks why you never wear the shirt, you say regrettably, “I love that shirt; I wore it so often it got holes in it from too many washes so I had to chuck it.”

4. It’s Monday morning and you’re still hungover from last night’s party. You call in to work and tell them:
(a) “I’m not coming in today. MAJOR hangover from the fantastic party last night! Too bad you missed it!”
(b) “I’m not feeling too well this morning. I kept throwing up in the middle of the night…but if I feel better later on, I might come in.”
(c) “I don’t know what I have but I feel REALLY sick today. I think it’s a really bad case of the flu,” while pretending to cough and wheeze every now and then. Who knows, maybe you can extend your sick leave until Wednesday!

5. You have an appointment with your friends but you’d rather spend the day lying in bed. You call them up to say:
(a) “My grandfather just had a heart attack and I can’t go meet you today…” while sobbing miserably.
(b) “Hey, I don’t wanna go anymore today. I’m too lazy and my bed feels too nice.”
(c) “Hey, I’m really sorry but something urgent came up so it looks like I’m gonna have to take a rain check today. Really sorry.”

See how much you scored:
1. (a) 1 (b) 2 (c) 3
2. (a) 3 (b) 2 (c) 1
3. (a) 2 (b) 1 (c) 3
4. (a) 1 (b) 2 (c) 3
5. (a) 3 (b) 1 (c) 2

You are:

Professional Fibber (13-15 points)
You’re so good at lying you’d probably ace a lie-detector test! Your life is so full of fibss that sometimes it’s hard to keep your story straight. In fact, this quiz is probably the only time in your life that you answered something truthfully.

Smooth Talker (9-12 points)
You try not to lie if you can help it, but on the rare occasions that you do, it’s to help avoid awkward confrontations or save someone from an embarrassing situation. A little white lie never hurt anyone. Unless you’re a professional fibber who lied on the quiz to make yourself look better.

Painfully Honest (5-8 points)
You think honesty is the best policy but you don’t realize that the truth can sometimes hurt others. With an attitude like that, it’s a wonder you have any friends left! The next time you’re about to give someone a truthful but horrible answer, spare them some feelings and think, “Do I have to be so dreadfully honest??”